Love and Respect
By Ross Gilbert
Many years ago, Bill and Anabel Gillham of Lifetime Ministries would travel across the USA offering marriage seminars. They would handout a survey to the attendees to better understand how each gender operated. They would ask the men, “I wish my wife would respect me by…” And they would ask the women, “I wish my husband would love me by…”
After a little while they stopped handing out the survey because they kept getting the same answers. They found that there are primarily three ways to respect your husband, and twenty ways to love your wife.
“Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.” - Ephesians 5:33
In the sermon on this topic, Pastor Ross encouraged us to converse with our spouse to discover how we can better fulfill our role as husband or wife.
To help this conversation, the answers from Bill and Anabel’s survey are listed below so you can talk with your spouse to answer the questions: “Husband, what can I do to show you respect?” and “Wife, what can I do that would meaningful show you love?”
Three Ways to Respect Your Husband
Support me in my dreams and desires
Praise me, build me up with your words and encouragement
Sex
Twenty Ways to Love Your Wife
By listening to me
By taking my ‘petty problems’ seriously
By communicating more openly with me
By noticing me more – not just when you want sex
By saying ‘thank you’ for the things I do
By being interested in my life…at least acting like you’re interested
By showing affection when other people are around
By sharing his goals and values with me; talking his business over with me
By remembering me with little gifts or just planning an evening out every so often
By taking me out without the kids more – maybe just for a ride
By including me in the things he does
By trying to understand me
By getting involved with things I enjoy doing
By just holding me in his arms and talking to me
By being tender and using kind, tender words
By helping in the discipline and raising of the children
By saying little words of caring, compliments, and appreciation
By accepting me just as I am
By spending more time with the family
By making me feel like a woman